In recent weeks, several clients have asked questions about retirement…. perhaps stimulated by dozens of TV commercials asking how much money you’ve saved and how old you imagine you might live to be. Regardless, the topic stimulated questions, reflections, and sometimes anxiety about historic decisions about jobs, careers, and savings.
One client asked: Why do people assume retirement is a given? A goal? This came from an individual who loves what she does and sees no reason to retire unless she is not, at some point, less capable to perform in her work role. I, by the way, share that “wonderment” because I too love what I do and plan to continue for as long as I am effective. But this question was just the first “layer” of wondering for this individual.
The next reflection from her: ‘I feel I have frequently been “out of step” with friends, colleagues, even cultural expectations. I’m planning to keep working while many people I know are moving to Florida!” Another thing to examine: What’s expected? What’s assumed? How influenced are we by what others do and the way they do it? And what does it feel like to step OUT of the appearance of “what is normal?”
The questions about retirement are also triggered by an economy that feels pretty shaky to many people. What’s realistic? How is the cost of living changing? How will I be impacted?
And the deepest question: How do I feel about aging and dying. Those are the harder questions. They are also the questions that provide extra fuel to the thoughts about retirement. How much longer will I “be around?” is not something most people talk about with any degree of comfort. And clearly, the conversations that involve hard questions are usually the most helpful for reducing anxiety and depression.
There are other, quite different ways to look at decisions about retirement. Many people dislike and even hate what they do. They work “in order” to retire, to quit. Others could not afford to quit work even if they want to because they couldn’t maintain a desired life style. And still others continue to work, regardless of whether they love or hate their jobs, simply to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table. So perhaps the question is less about retirement and more about quality of life…. the state of the economy….. the growing gap between the affluent and middle class and those at and below the poverty level. The assumption that people will retire might open a needed conversation at multiple levels about quality of life, facing into who we are, how we live, what we do to make a difference — for ourselves and for others.